Vlad closed the door after Baron. He had seemed a little sceptical that Vlad could follow up on his words that Eva would join him shortly and go with him to Boldavia, but it was nowhere near as sceptical as the eyes that were drilling through the back of his head right now. When he turned back around to Eva she was glaring at him. Well perhaps this would get her to talk. She had said very little since leaving Haaskinz's office last night. It scared him. At least during her moments of frenzied panic she was still talking and saying what was on her mind. This was infinitely worse. He hadn't slept all night. He wasn't proud of himself for thinking it, but he couldn't deny he was afraid she might run again if he let his guard down. That was the one thing he knew he couldn't take. But she seemed content to stay in his arms. She was so exhausted from the last few days that she even slept quite soundly most of the night, if not by choice. He wanted to help her, dammit! But everything he said was met with silence, or at best a silent tearful hug. Even Oberon was lying beside her looking very forlorn. Her sorrow had a tendency to leak. He knew how he felt. But it looked like that was finally changing. Baron had been there to remind her they needed to sort out the situation in Boldavia. She had refused to go with him, saying things that made Vlad almost drop the mugs he had been carrying from the kitchen at the time. Baron didn't have a hope of convincing her. He didn't know her the way Vlad did. And it was time to put that to the test. She didn't look at all impressed.
"What was that about? I'm not going with him, Vladimir."
The direct approach seemed as good as any to start with. "Yes you are. Now you'd better get dressed." He opened the wardrobe, looking for something warm for her to wear. It was damn cold up there this time of year. The wardrobe door slammed shut, almost catching his fingers.
"I'm not going! Didn't you hear me?!"
He swung around. "Yes I did! And I won't let you sit here thinking those things! Markus was not right!"
"How can you say that?"
He came over to the bed and sat beside her. "Because it's not true. Okay, things got out of hand this -"
"Out of hand?" She laughed. It wasn't funny. "Tell Randall that."
"He'd understand you were doing what you thought was best."
"He's dead. I watched him die and he didn't understand it at all."
"No you didn't." Vlad shook his head and gripped her hand, too tight for her to be bothered trying to shake him off. "He was already dead when you saw him, Eva. Boris killed him."
"Details, Vlad. Either way he's dead and it's because of me. And for what? Absolutely nothing! I accomplished nothing! And now I'm stuck with this crown until someone else comes for it and kills more people to do it!"
She was panicking again. The colour was gone from her face as she strained to catch a breath in between. He had to hug her. He wished more than anything that it could be enough for him to just hold her. But Eva would need more than that. He held her face in his hands. "Ssh. Not for nothing. Because you believed protecting Boldavia was more important than exacting revenge. That still has to be done. It's still important to you, isn't it?"
"Of course it is! But maybe the best way I can help is to stay well out of the way. Baron can handle it. My next mistake could get the whole Principality blown up!"
"Honey we all make mistakes! And sometimes people die. It's rotten but it happens. You don't know how often I've seen it in the constabulary, and that's nothing to the army I bet!"
She turned away from him. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?"
He turned her face back to him. "No. If I thought I could do anything to take the pain away from you, you know I would. But all I can do is tell you you're not alone. You'll get through this and I'll be here to help you."
The tears started to spill down her cheeks. It reminded him a lot more than he liked of that night two years ago. She wrapped her arms around him. He could barely make out her muffled speech from the crook of his neck. "I've never been more afraid of losing anyone than I am of losing you. I couldn't stand it. I couldn't live -"
He felt a chill through him so held her tighter. "Now stop it. You're so brave and strong you can get through anything with or without me. And I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere. We'll get through it together, I swear."
She was crying louder now. "Oh Vlad..."
"Hey." He managed to pull her back just enough so he could wipe her face and look in her eyes. It killed him to see them in so much pain. "I love you, Jenviev Zepp Telari. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you." He gulped. "And right now that includes making you go to Boldavia. I know you, Eva. The only way you're going to get over this is to make something good of it and I won't let you miss this chance."
She sniffed. "I don't know how."
"You'll find a way. You always do."
"I'm so sorry, Vlad. I wish I could take it all back. I should have just given the damn thing to Boris! Instead I put everyone I care about in danger."
"Honey no one can blame you for not wanting to trust Boris with something like that! I wouldn't. I would have done the very same you did."
"No. You would never have taken the crown in the first place."
He couldn't really answer that. She was right and she knew it. So he switched tactic. "Please go to Boldavia."
"I don't want to."
"You have to. You've got to see this through. And we both have family there."
"I'm so sorry for dragging you into all this. Markus is probably furious at me for taking you away."
He took both her hands. "Hey, don't worry about him. We were almost finished anyway. A couple of days and I would have been back with you again. Where you are is where I want to be. And that means if you're in trouble, or if you're hurting, then I am too. That's not just the way it is, it's the way I want it."
"That hardly seems fair."
"Are you kidding?! Since Swiftmont I wake up every morning amazed at how lucky I am that I'm with you. I'd much rather be here with you through all of this than be oblivious to it all and without you. Haven't you got it yet, how much I love you?"
She didn't say anything for a long time but Vlad could see, it was finally working. The spark was back in her eyes when she finally spoke. "You'll be careful? Just because the wraiths didn't come last night, doesn't mean they won't."
"I have the protections. I'll be fine. And once you've worked out what needs to be done, I'll be here to help you."
"I feel so bad inside."
He squeezed her shoulder. "Of course you do. That's what makes you a good person, Jenviev. And it does get better. It will get better." He wiped away the fresh tears. "So don't be so hard on yourself."
Even her words seemed heavy on her shoulders. "He was such a good friend to me. I'm going to miss him."
"So you know he'd want you to get on with things and not lose Boldavia over him."
She managed to smile through the tears. It was beautiful for him to see. "Okay, Vlad. I'm going. You can stop now."
He smiled back. "I'll never stop, Eva. Not ever."
"Thank you."
"He'll be in the Boatman's Tavern. You should hurry."
She picked up Oberon who had finally lifted his head out of his own melancholy. "What do you think, Obe? Want to go up against another Prince?" The cat licked her nose as he was accustomed to doing. And then in a big surprise to them both, he wriggled out of Eva's hands and approached Vlad, pushing his head into his hand looking to have his ears scratched. Vlad did so, still somewhat stunned at this new turn of events. Eva was smiling again, this time with a little more ease. There was hope.
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